7 Ways to Get Your Roommate to Leave You
I just moved into my new apartment and met some strange dirty guy that told me he is to be my roommate. If something similar happens to you, you may want to read some of the following tips Chris wrote up about getting your roommate to leave you:
Due to the controversy of my 7 Ways to Get Kicked Out of Class, I decided to just write a similar story in the hopes of pissing off some more humorless people.
Here is the best ways I could think of to try to get rid of your roommate either to get a new one or not have a roommate at all. I have only tried a couple of these so am not entirely sure they will all work.
1. Stay awake until your roommate is sleeping and then secretly take pictures of him or her. Show all your friends and laugh about the different sleeping positions your roommate has. An alternative to this is to film him or her, especially if he or she snores.
2. When you have some free time, find your roommate and watch him or her. Correct whatever it is he or she is doing and help them do it the “right” way. Fun things include typing on the computer, brushing his or her teeth, doing his or her homework, sleeping in a certain position, chewing, shaving, and pretty much anything else.
3. Become needy of your roommate. Always ask where he or she is going when your roommate leaves the room, even if it is to go to the bathroom. You can also try calling continuously and asking him or her, “Well, where are you now?” or “Are you almost home?”